Being 52 now, I got a relationship with a man at the age of
eight-nine of whom I was told later that he was a 'pedophile'. The relationship went on until I was about
fourteen years old and we were lucky that it remained undiscovered and free of police enquiries.
Even today, so many years later, I remember my big friend with gratitude, as he made my coming out as a gay person later on – and many other things in my life - a lot easier for me.
Since then, I have met numerous people who also had [consensual] sexual relationships with adults as children and teenagers and who are not ashamed of this. It is easy to understand why such people never get in touch with abuse counseling agencies, because they really don't need such help. That's how such
centers get a completely one-sided view of so-called victims of abuse.
The anonymous writer of this letter may well have been Kurt Hartmann, known for his activism in the field of sexual politics.
The directors of the German television show Quivive of Rundfunk Berlin-Brandenburg (rbb) received a letter from him as a response to a program from 2005 about a therapy for 'pedophiles'.
In his letter, Hartmann states that the program is one-sided because it does not cover positive experiences with 'pedophile' relationships.
Among other things, Hartmann shares his own experiences as as child as follows:
“At the age of 8-9, I got to know a man with whom a friendship developed that lasted for about 5 years. With this man, about whom I later heard that he would be
'pedophile', I had my first relational sex experiences. Even now, after about 40 years, I wouldn't have wanted to miss these sexual and relational experiences. For my subsequent gay coming out they were enormously important and helpful”.